Monday, June 30, 2008


Last year I went to the Utah Arts Festival with my dear friend Erin Cotten. We became instant fans and decided that we must attend every year. So, last Saturday, armed with sunscreen, sodas, and an insatiable thirst for art, we descended upon Library Square.

It was approximately 168 degrees at the festival. We wandered endless booths of paintings, drawings, photography, graffiti-art, mixed-media, collage, oragami and more. The Arts Festival is always a strange mix of awe and inspiration for me. A part of me wishes I had the talent that these artists have and another part of me starts itching to create. Maybe I could have the talent these artists have?

We watched 30 little kids play Turkey in the Straw on their pint-sized violins and we saw Flamenco dancers who danced with the fury of a thousand suns. (Speaking of the sun; the only relief that we had from the heat was wading through the library fountain in our flip-flops surrounded by timid children dipping their toes in the water and banshee children climbing the wet cement walls unattended. It was actually one of my favorite parts of the day.) We watched our beloved Poetry Slam and finished up the night watching Samba Fogo, a capoiera/Brazilian fire dance team that was PHEONMENAL.

The only downside to the Samba Fogo performance was the drunk guy next to me who was furious that people were sitting on the stairs and standing in the aisles at a free public outdoor event. Even though it made it very awkward to be standing next to him, it would have been more awkward if I was his girlfriend. Note to self: Don't go out with guys who get drunk at family friendly events and complain very loudly that there are too many people and he can't get to the f*@$ing bathroom.

Overall the event was fabulous. We saw great art, got some good sun AND we got to see our least favorite poet in the entire world get thrown off the stage for inappropriate content. YES! It was a perfect ending to a perfect day.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Things That Should Not Make Me Happy - But Do

At 11:30am this morning I realized that it was 11:30am and not 5:00pm. This is a terrible thing to realize when you are at work. However, never fear! To the rescue came the ridiculous institution that is pop-culture news. Here are some of the treasures that entertained me today:
Jesus spotted in ultrasound image?
Jesus spotted in ultrasound image?

I think that speaks for itself. I must add, however, that I did suggest to my co-workers that we visit The Holy Land Experience while in Orlando. I don't know why that didn't take.

This next photo will most likely speak for itself as well:

NKOTB are BACK - AND their official photo stream is through flickr. This is quality business folks. They must be taken seriously. Please enjoy the NKOTB goodness.

Friday, June 20, 2008

People's Hottest Bachelors of 2008

This year People magazine published a pretty tasty list of Hollywood's Hottest Bachelors. Gracing the list were, of course, veteran Hotties George Clooney and Gerard Butler. There were also several lovely film and television stars, rock stars, comedians, a resurrected teen actor (Mario Lopez), and an interesting surprise:

In the wake of his sisters' domination of the pop-culture world (one being a tragic train-wreck of a pop princess and the other a poster-child for teen pregnancy) Bryan Spears must have been feeling left out. The television producer(of his baby sister's show)has been laying low as the unpublicized eldest sibling of the Spears family.

Well, he is unnoticed no longer. However, his presence on this list causes my mind to wander in two ways. The first: Although not too terrible to look at, does Brian really deserve a place amongst Hollywood's most desirable? There are a lot of good looking, talented, successful single men out there and, let me tell you friends, I am just not convinced by Bryan's less than impressive resume and photo. In the picture the dog is more prominent than he his, he is too far back for you to see his face and his body is obscured by his wet, baggy clothing. Maybe he has a sweet spirit. I don't know?

The second way my mind wanders is to the validity and popularity of the institution of marriage. In thinking of a replacement for Mr. Spears my mind instantly thinks of my favorite Hollywood hunk, Christian Bale. Only one problem there, he is married. So, maybe all of the good ones were taken? As it is, I am glad that there are so many of Hollywood's finest that are seeing fit to try their hand at commitment. Bryan, I am sure you do have a sweet spirit and as you are apparently one of the only ones left out there, I wish you the very best of luck.

In closing, recent American Idol winner David Cook also made the list. I publish this picture to say that if I wanted melt into a puddle of school-girl residue when I looked at Bryan Spears picture, I never would have written this. Congratulations go to David for not making me question for a moment why he made the list.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

My New Bici!

In wake of gas prices rising faster than my heart rate did when that beautiful European man walked in for a tour today, I recently decided to seek out alternate means of transportation. I found my new bike at the Bike Peddler in American Fork. (I have a great affinity towards small businesses in my hometown) When I walked in the store I realized that I had no idea about how to find the right bike for me. So, I put myself into the hands of a very capable shop employee. The first thing he asked me was how tall I was. Next he asked if I had finished growing. I looked at him like he was maybe just a little bit nuts. He asked my age. "26, I replied. And yes, I have finished growing." He told me I didn't look 26. Apparently I would be a great candidate for that "10 Years Younger" show and I wouldn't even need the makeover.
Thankfully, the man knew more about bikes than the growing habits of females. Not long after this I realized that I haven't been on a bike in probably 5 or 6 years. It was brought to my attention when I was invited to test drive several styles of bike before buying. It was with palpable trepidation that I mounted the bike and rode off to circle the block with less than my normal confidence and flair. Soon, however, I was gliding with ease and completely sold on the idea of a new bike. I came home with a Specialized Myka Sport. It is my new love. What can I say? I am a fickle lover. I am now an avid and dedicated cyclist, 1 week and counting.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Corny Jokes

Sometimes, bad jokes stick with you. For example:

What is brown and sticky?

A stick.

What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?

A pouch potato.

And recently:

What is green and fuzzy, has four legs and will smash you if it falls out of a tree and lands on you?

That's right folks:

A pool table.

It's ok, you can laugh. It is one of the worst jokes I have ever heard, and yet it makes me laugh every time I think about it. Who comes up with these things? My friend Erin Cotten says that lots of people aren't famous for their talent, but because they were the first to act on an idea that was crazy enough to become famous. You hear things made up by these people or see things they made and you say to yourself. "Are you serious? I could do that!" But you didn't. So they are famous and you aren't.

I wish I made this joke up, but I didn't. So, I will just have to continue to rely on people who have way too much time on their hands to make up things that will make me laugh.

Friday, June 6, 2008

More Food Service Love (Exotic Style)

This could possibly be my third blog entry about being hit on whilst eating out. When I was in Europe I was hit on more than I have been ever, collectively, in all my 26 years of life. Most of it was when we were in or near food establishments. One of my favorites was at Trevi Fountain in Rome. It had taken the better part of the day to find it, we kept getting lost or distracted. We decided to get some gelato to reward ourselves for finding the fountain. We found ourselves standing in a busy, tourist infested gelato shop and two workers were chatting loudly and quickly across the counter in Italian. The next thing I know, the one who is standing next to me turns to me and says,

You are beautiful.


I get off work at 9, come with me for a drink?

I don't think I could find my way back here.

Will you kiss me?

Why not?

(I kissed him on the cheek and he kissed me back, on the cheek)

Come with me for a drink?

I don't drink

You can have something else.

(At this point I am thinking, um, if I don't drink, I probably also won't be sleeping with you. Why are you so persistent? But he was)

He offered his co-worker as a date for Erin, but somehow we found the strength to continue to resists their Italian charms. On the way out of the shop he came back over and asked again. This time he offered me the opportunity to ditch my friend and go with him. Just him and me, and Italy. Tempting, but I stayed strong and lived through yet another fast food flirting experience. At this point I would like to say that I rejected him because it isn't a good idea to run off with gelato men in a foreign country, but it was mostly because he had bad teeth. Honestly, if the guy behind the counter had been the one doing the inviting, I probably would have found my way back to the gelato shop at the Trevi Fountain at 9 o'clock that night.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Jennica Dorsey, World Traveler

I took this picture. That's right, I was standing there, on a bridge in Paris. I still can't believe that I went. I couldn't believe it when I was going, I couldn't believe it when I was there, and now I can't believe that I went. It takes a little bit of steam out of the excitement of the trip when you have a hard time comprehending that you actually went. However, I do remember, rather vividly, being exceedingly tired, and having a marvelous time. Here are some of the highlights:

The British Library. Way too many literary treasures for such a tiny spot.

Tower of London. I don't know why I like to see where people died. I especially liked being in the church where Sir Thomas More is buried.

Platform 9 3/4. Yes, I really am that big of a geek.

Trafalgar Square, the black hole of London. Whenever we got lost, we ended up there. I loved it.

Satan slept in our hostel in London. Some schizophrenic guy was talking in his sleep in the most vulgar, disgusting, debased, violent, and frightening ways. I would have slept on the street but I was too afraid to move.

Double decker buses and black taxi cabs.

A whole parade of soldiers in the classic British Toy Soldier uniform. Loved it.

Italy loved me. I have never had so many guys hit on me. That place is very good for a girl's self-esteem.

We went out to the coast for half a day. It was the most anti-climactic event of the trip. But we had some good laughs.

Old things, they were just so old. (That is for you Erin!)

Gelato. Enough said.

The guards at the Vatican Museum. The most beautiful people I have ever seen.

Treasures. That whole city is full of hidden treasures.

The Colosseum. I don't know why I like to see where people died. But it is one of the 7 wonders.

Rain. It rained the last 3 days we were there.

Paris, city of lights!

We stayed in the most adorable little town just outside of Paris. It was nice to have another view of Paris.

The Champs-Elysees. We went there everyday.

Climbing the steps of the tower in Notre Dame. By far my favorite view of the city, plus I love any opportunity to feel like I am in a Disney movie.

Crepes. Enough said.

Paris Disneyland. Yes, I am that big of a geek.

Lunch at the Eiffel Tower. A dream come true.