Friday, August 14, 2009

Update on the Purse Burglar

I completely forgot to follow up on my purse burglar post! Here is my reply to the ransom note:

Dear Purse Burglar(s),

First, I would like to thank you for your very polite ransom note. I always feel more inclined to respond when I am addressed as "Dear" Victim. However, I must admit that your terms are rather steep terms and I fear that as a lowly recruitment coordinator, there is no way that I will be able to live up to such exorbitant demands. Might I suggest a compromise?

1. Slurpees at Staff Meeting - A. Pina colada lemonade at the Outback Steakhouse
2.Raises for everyone - B. Raises that come in the form WORK! Effective August 26th, 2009 (approximately)
3.Paid vacation - C. One (1) all expenses paid trip to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry
4.Oreo cookies - D. Layer cakes. Tomorrow.

Should these compromises be satisfactory, I will await the return of my currently secured valuables. I will be walking out of my office at precisely 3:45pm, giving any interested party the opportunity to return the stolen goods without compromising their identity.

Those are my terms.

Yours truly,

The Victim

After a bit of negation over my proposed terms, my purse was safely returned. The next day began the most amazing Ambassador Training Retreat that this school has ever seen. Here is why:



I have a pretty cool job. Even if my purse does get stolen every once in a while.

1 comment:

Lindsay Pace said...

You are the BEST BOSS EVER! Do you want to be my boss?